A commentary on Delhi and it’s rape culture

In the present times, the term ‘rape’ becomes more and more visible in our newspapers and tabloids with every passing day. From accusations against powerful people such as Brett Kavanaugh and Woody Allen to the Me Too movement, and to add examples from my own community, the Nirbhaya, Kathua and Unnao cases among thousands of (un)reported ones, the psychological damage that rape leaves behind on its victims is almost like a signature, a mark they will carry for the rest of their lives. Its magnitude, however, is unfathomable. The injustices of rape, however, far exceed the act itself.

The term ‘Rape Culture’ only came into being in the 1970s, but this sociological issue has existed since time immemorial. Rape culture is the name given to our society’s normalization of rape and sexual assault and blaming the victims for their own assaults. However, the term itself is seen as a taboo. A raped woman in India won’t just face scrutiny, her entire life and character will be questioned, she’ll probably be fired because nobody wants to be associated with ‘that type’ of a woman, any existing romantic relationships and engagements will be broken, but most shamefully, she would be considered ‘impure’ and ‘easy’. The purity debate and its supporters don’t even exclude those who were non-consensually forced to engage in sexual relations. Rape culture is so deeply ingrained in our daily lives, we forget to even notice how easily we promote it. From condemning girls on the length of their clothes to the very infamous ‘boys will be boys,’ rape culture has made a place for itself in every single community. And proof? In a revolting incident in Delhi (India) recently, an Instagram public chat (‘bois locker room’) went viral that sexualized, morphed and objectified women and their bodies. But what was even more shocking was that the people involved in the chat were teenage boys from the most elite private schools from around the city, and the women who were so easily objectified? Their own classmates, 16-year-old minor girls. As for the justification certain members of the community provided, from boys will be boys to how women should have more self-respect than sharing their private pictures, I’ll let you take your pick. However, it must be applauded how effectively social media worked here. With Instagram blown up with stories, posts and even personal recollections, people made sure that the teenage girls got the justice, safety and support they deserved. The Delhi Police and the Delhi Commission for Women made sure to conduct investigations, file a case against the perpetrators and the administrator of the group has been arrested. When this author asked her own community to react, one source said,” This is how the world works.” Another said,” Girls need to take care of how much they ‘excite’ boys,” While another spoke about how she is going to rethink everything she does from now on. Notice the pattern here? Notice how easily the society is accepts that it wasn’t the boys and their mindsets, but rather the girls and their rights that had to be altered? This is precisely how rape culture works. When it becomes that easy for the perpetrator to walk unscathed while the victims have to deal with all the music, that is when we know that something isn’t just wrong with our parenting, but also with our education, our culture and the very essence of our society. While all these shocking opinions came to light, passionate arguments and empowering words were also put forth, Some snippets include, “How can horrible people hide under perfect personas?”, “People are generating hate for girls, trying to divert attention from who is really at fault,” “However young they may be, they must understand that it is not okay to harass girls,” and “Sexual objectification is not acceptable, whether the perpetrator is a boy, girl or a trans person.” These beliefs give us hope, that maybe, just maybe our world can still be truly livable. If only we lived in a more accepting, mature and sensitive society, we’d be living in a happier and safer world. Now the question arises, how do we make a more accepting, mature and sensitive society? How do we combat the misogyny and the culture that denies people the most basic of rights- dignity of self? The solution- normalization. Not the normalization of rape or of victim blaming, but the normalization of starting healthy, unafraid and open conversations. In a country where sex education is unheard of, and the voices of teenagers always suppressed, healthy conversations among friends, family and genders alongside a more open education system is the only way the inherent gap in where we are and where we ought to be can be bridged. Till the eyes of the perpetrators do not learn to accept that they need to stop judging all genders for their bodies, but for who they are as people; no matter how many layers we cover ourselves in, we’d still be judged for what is underneath them. The ability to bring about change is in the hands of the youth, the only question that persists, will we do justice to it?

Written by Umang Dhingra, President